Babies, they make me post smooshy

This morning Guerin stumbled into the room where I am sleeping, plopped Alison in the bed with me, mumbled something like, "she wants to see you," and high-tailed it out the door. I was a little confused at first, thinking maybe he handed her to me in order to make coffee, but Georgia and I soon realized he was back in bed, sound asleep. Alison has taken to me, and only me (besides her parents), in such a flattering way that I cannot figure out what I did? Yes, this was my master plan all along, but I never thought it would happen this fast, or hold this tight. Georgia and I are staying in a room together and so I cuddled Alison in the bed with us for a while, still sleepy, still confused, and she would tentatively play with Georgia but then crane her neck around just to check. You still there? Good, stay. After a while I pulled us both out of the comfortable, warm place, because yep! didn't look like I was getting anymore sleep and she helped me make coffee and take the dogs out. She does this thing. This little thing where if you catch her in the right moment she'll smirk, trying hard not to all out smile and then when she can take it no more, bursts into a grin. And I've always wanted kids, lots of them. But also always felt this fear in my chest. Like Oh God, I won't be a child anymore. And I will always have something, someone, to worry and take care of. But now, I'm really not that scared anymore.